i like to watch

from time to time i find myself with some extra time on my hands. a pastime/hobby that i’ve had for some time now is i watch international/foreign/not-north american television shows online (usually just on th.e youtube, eh) more specifically, i watch the gay storylines of european teen angst soap operas (hollyoaks – great britain, andra avenyn – sweden, alles was zälht – germany, to name a few)

these storylines always pull me in...and i stay up much too late watching the next episode, or i take too long of a break a the office...

the worst part, though, is that i hate that i love these shows. i mean, other than there being good-looking actors in never-would-happen-in-real-life scenarios, i'm reminded of my singledom. it's almost like schadenfreude, but on myself.

still, i love the shows. i could argue that i like them because they're not in english (save the english ones, dur). i wonder if it has to do with me never being an out teen/young adult. when i came out, i passed the stage when all that angst should [societally determined] have come and gone. alas, all that was held within...

oh woe is me...

...oh woe is i

so, those be my thoughts at this tide.
any readers out there, i hope your day isn't as sodden as my city's day is... all day.

hic extraneus...well you know