le veulent-ils?
le veulent-elles?
un peu de gras d'extra n'est pas mauvais... n'est pas laid--l'est-il?
le suis-je?
je hais les photos qui me font sentir trop trop....
je les hais.
frak les. frak les toutes.
je suis assez comme je suis. je ne dois pas me changer.
je suis content....
je prétends...
je frake
hic extraneus sum
Friday, March 20, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
þorsdagr
thursday is definitely one of my favourite days of the week. thursday is FJC night. once a week i get together with a handfull of my closest friends and we catch up with each other about our lives. if my life were a television show, this would be the opening and closing setting, whence each characters' weekly activities would be narrated.
i love my FJC. tonight was interesting to start. we had decided on a restaurant to which we've gone before and that we really liked. i got there at the 9 o'clock end of the 8:30-9:00 spectrum, but was only the second to arrive. at the door, however, i found eskje with her ipod in, shivering outside the newspapered windows of the para-revonation restaurant. frak. we decided on another pub in the area. i got us coffee to drink as we waited for the other two to arrive. tjaad got there next, and árn next. it was good to catch up on things.
i'm always a little surprised at the things we say to each other. it's not like any of us four keeps secrets for the other; in all actually we propably know too much about each other! ha. still, i'm impressed and find comfort in knowing that my friends trust me enough to open up about their lives, the way i do with them. fuzzy bunnies or something i know...
after a few pints and tastmazing soup (sooo underated) árn and i hit up the malemeatmarketstip for another drink or two. it had been a while since he'd been out to the show and dance. good times.
my good friend is with, but is still quite the attracting force on the sailors and such. happy for him i am, but cannot deny the feelings of pq pas moi?...quand est-il à mon tour?... it's not right for me to write of such things on such a public space, i know, but when one gets in to theirs this late at night and this not-sober, with a new blogentry open on the screen, one is rather tempted to spew out all that is on one's mind. restraint....rest.raint.
at least there was some good tunes playing. danced danced.
thought of my list. those who've come before and gone since. they were good times. at least so they seemed. happy times. happier times.
the day is done and another already begun. i should get to bed...my mess of a bed. morning is minutes away. frak. another day of smilinghiding. can't wait.
can't frakin' wait.
hic extraneus sum
i love my FJC. tonight was interesting to start. we had decided on a restaurant to which we've gone before and that we really liked. i got there at the 9 o'clock end of the 8:30-9:00 spectrum, but was only the second to arrive. at the door, however, i found eskje with her ipod in, shivering outside the newspapered windows of the para-revonation restaurant. frak. we decided on another pub in the area. i got us coffee to drink as we waited for the other two to arrive. tjaad got there next, and árn next. it was good to catch up on things.
i'm always a little surprised at the things we say to each other. it's not like any of us four keeps secrets for the other; in all actually we propably know too much about each other! ha. still, i'm impressed and find comfort in knowing that my friends trust me enough to open up about their lives, the way i do with them. fuzzy bunnies or something i know...
after a few pints and tastmazing soup (sooo underated) árn and i hit up the malemeatmarketstip for another drink or two. it had been a while since he'd been out to the show and dance. good times.
my good friend is with, but is still quite the attracting force on the sailors and such. happy for him i am, but cannot deny the feelings of pq pas moi?...quand est-il à mon tour?... it's not right for me to write of such things on such a public space, i know, but when one gets in to theirs this late at night and this not-sober, with a new blogentry open on the screen, one is rather tempted to spew out all that is on one's mind. restraint....rest.raint.
rant.
vent.
worry.
wonder.
at least there was some good tunes playing. danced danced.
thought of my list. those who've come before and gone since. they were good times. at least so they seemed. happy times. happier times.
again to feel the warmth on my face
to swim in the strong embrace
music to my eyes
thoughts of bygone tides
the day is done and another already begun. i should get to bed...my mess of a bed. morning is minutes away. frak. another day of smilinghiding. can't wait.
can't frakin' wait.
hic extraneus sum
Monday, March 16, 2009
long blog time
whoa... some things should be left in the past.
blogging here has been on and off for a few years now. every so often i delete my daveterpreter, each time for a different reason. i've looked back at my blogsphere past and i've rediscovered my LJ past.
whoa. would have been better to have let lying stones where they lie.
the only saving grace for me was that i wrote not in english, nor en français...rather i kept my spirits up by putting myself down in my own tongue. only i knew of the daurk thoughts that struck blows and the haursh thoughts that plagued my mind... (i'm better now i fear)
lookon at me two years ago...
thoughts?
frémdhmaan her ih'm
blogging here has been on and off for a few years now. every so often i delete my daveterpreter, each time for a different reason. i've looked back at my blogsphere past and i've rediscovered my LJ past.
whoa. would have been better to have let lying stones where they lie.
the only saving grace for me was that i wrote not in english, nor en français...rather i kept my spirits up by putting myself down in my own tongue. only i knew of the daurk thoughts that struck blows and the haursh thoughts that plagued my mind... (i'm better now i fear)
tis werld iss stupid
ih wiss ne hwat exack ih woell forn hjo, me tis werld iss ne god foer mih. allt ih woell iss a' littl bit gljadhet swo ih kan bettren mij lef. to frostehs? ih woell hwat alltman eles redn haft odh tat te hsawn mih alltdajlih odh...hwatefre. lef iss ne god ne feir. hwafer iss mij lef swo swo hjo iss? Ih hafe netigh tat ih kann hsawn te'n werld, mij friedhe er mij fjamill. mij job iss edhast kontrack odh alltlih wiss ih ne hwat ih woell toen foer werk typus karrère, me ih ferske odh ferske odh ferske, me netide komm ih on an answere te mij problemn.
wef to frostehs hwat ih hafe hsrifen her, hjelp mih medh mij problemn, assoblif. ih hwestte redn tide bi hsrifen fwo a' neiuh leitsprek. lef iss ne feir, me hjo kann bekomen god odh bettre...ih hope. hwen komm on hit mij go? hwan komm mij man, mij perfeck man hwa werdt bettren mij problemn odh hsawn mih tat te werld ne iss alltide swo grim? HWAN!? ih hafe redn wadte tefel tide foer mij go, me hwat kann ih ten? stupide werld...
lookon at me two years ago...
thoughts?
frémdhmaan her ih'm
frak! trop impatient pou mon propre bien...
je l'ai fait. j'ai dépassé la ligne.
frak. je déteste mon zèle
quelles seront-elles les conséquences...
frak.
hic extrafrakineus sum
frak. je déteste mon zèle
quelles seront-elles les conséquences...
frak.
hic extrafrakineus sum
Saturday, March 14, 2009
odio
te odio
en este momento
estoy pensando en ti
te odio
grito a voz alta
¿porqué sigues
confunfiéndome?
te odio
a menudo
te odio
confunfiéndome?
te odio
a menudo
te odio
hic extraneus sum
una nit a la catalana
ahir vaig anar a una sopar amb uns amics del casal català aquí on visc. normalment som només quatre o cinc joves; però anit hi havia una quinzena de catalans (i altres espanyols. també una canadenca que no parlava català ni castellà.
no sabia si hi aniria, no obstant al fi hi vaig anar i la nit em va agradar moltíssim. a cada cop que parlo català, m’adono compte de que em fa falta i que n’he perdut molt molt.
bé, és clar qu’haig d’enfocar-me a imersió total a reaprendre aquesta llengua que em plau tant.
aquí sóc estranger
no sabia si hi aniria, no obstant al fi hi vaig anar i la nit em va agradar moltíssim. a cada cop que parlo català, m’adono compte de que em fa falta i que n’he perdut molt molt.
bé, és clar qu’haig d’enfocar-me a imersió total a reaprendre aquesta llengua que em plau tant.
aquí sóc estranger
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
these are the days the werld tilts more
i am no atlas yet i feel the weight of the earð on my shoulders. the werld stands not straight as would a spinning top; nor on its side like a gyroscope. it tilts.
quite natural. an axis on which it spins turns whirls. its angle of tilt is precise. not too deep steep; nor too upright. balance unbalanced. the slightest change of status quo would could should tilt the werld that bit more and all would crash fall stall.
end.
i am no atlas. i cannot carry the earð alone. yet still i forge on, tauri on me. pushing aside the pain the nerves. i am to focus. so close; more than half-way…much more.
whole werlds balance on hairs shoulders axes. the little things added onto the shoulders responsiliailiobligaduty on my shoulders.
deep breaths. deep sighs.
deep thoughs.
i am no atlas, no.
i am i.
hic extraneus sum
quite natural. an axis on which it spins turns whirls. its angle of tilt is precise. not too deep steep; nor too upright. balance unbalanced. the slightest change of status quo would could should tilt the werld that bit more and all would crash fall stall.
end.
i am no atlas. i cannot carry the earð alone. yet still i forge on, tauri on me. pushing aside the pain the nerves. i am to focus. so close; more than half-way…much more.
whole werlds balance on hairs shoulders axes. the little things added onto the shoulders responsiliailiobligaduty on my shoulders.
deep breaths. deep sighs.
deep thoughs.
i am no atlas, no.
i am i.
hic extraneus sum
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